


Hidden Winter

by camichats



Category: Marvel
Genre: Established Relationship, Hopeful Ending, Identity Porn, Identity Reveal, M/M, Minor Injuries, Relationship Issues, Secret Identity, Secrets, Villains, Winter Soldier Bucky Barnes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-18
Updated: 2019-04-18
Packaged: 2020-01-16 03:09:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,027
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18512668
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/camichats/pseuds/camichats
Summary: Tony thinks he has a pretty great life post-Iron Man. Riri's got everything nicely in hand, but he gets worried about Bucky. Bucky hates that he's keeping his Winter Soldier identity secret, but he thinks that he's in too deep to get out.(Tony Stark Bingo A2-Riri Williams, Winteriron Bingo B4-Villains)





	Hidden Winter

The thing was this: Tony wasn't an Avenger anymore, and he actually liked it. He was still considered to be The Iron Man because he was the first one, the creator of it, and he still thought of himself that way because of the arc reactor in his chest and the fact that he was still involved in the iterations of it. Not to say that it couldn't have been done without him though, because Riri was more than capable of being Ironheart without his help, but she let him tag along for brainstorming when they both had the time, and technically the arc reactor was his and his alone, so it was a sort of loaning process that she used it in her suit. Again, not that she actually needed the help.

So Tony wasn't an Avenger, and these days he wasn't even around very often, only to visit Riri and talk shop. Which meant that right now as he was visiting the Compound, he rang the doorbell like he was a normal visitor. Riri was expecting him, so she answered a minute later with a smile. "Hey Tony!"

"Hey Riri. How've things been?" he asked as they started to walk to the 'shop.

She made a face. "The Winter Soldier is becoming more villain than vigilante these days."

"I thought he just went after Hydra?"

"That's what we thought too," she muttered, then shook her head, shooting him another smile. "It's not your problem though, Mister 'I'm Retired'. How's the husband?"

Tony let her change the subject, not that it was hard because if there was one thing he loved more than engineering, it was Bucky. "He's good. Work's been kicking his ass a little, but that's not new unfortunately." He shrugged helplessly. "It was hard enough for him to be a firefighter before we had a new crop of pyromaniac villains, and now it's like he's having to pull overtime every single week."

"I guess he's the sort of guy that doesn't just want you as a sugar daddy?"

"Nope, and believe me I've tried to convince him."

"You're not much better, you know. You could make Pepper CEO instead of her flying around as Rescue, and then you could stay at home all day for the rest of your life."

Tony understood the point she was making and wrinkled his nose at the thought of what she described. Without the company _or_ Iron Man to take up his time, he'd go mad in a week, a month tops if Bucky also wasn't working. "That sounds boring."

"Oh extremely," she agreed. "I'm just pointing out that anyone you married is probably the same."

Tony sighed, as if this bothered him. As if he didn't know this about Bucky long before they got married, and as if he didn't completely love him for it. He just wished it stressed him a little less. "Yeah." They made it to the workshop a little bit later, and the topic shifted to the newest suit and Riri's ideas for it.

* * *

"Bucky, you home?" Tony called as he got off the elevator to their penthouse.

He didn't get a response, but Bucky shuffled out a minute later as Tony was unbuttoning his shirt, holding ice to his neck. Tony turned at the noise, and Bucky nodded hello.

"Are you okay?" Tony asked, tripping over his feet in his hurry to get to his husband's side.

"Fine," he said, but he spoke quietly and his voice was raspy.

"What happened?" Tony covered Bucky's hand with his own, gently pulling the bag away from his neck to assess the damage.

"Accident at work."

" _Accident_?" It looked like his neck had been hit with a plank of wood straight on. It was a miracle his throat hadn't been crushed, in Tony's opinion. "What the hell kind of accident attacks your throat?" He gingerly placed the ice back on Bucky's throat, wincing sympathetically.

"The bad kind," Bucky said sardonically-- or as sardonically as he could. "It looks worse than it is."

"I really doubt that." Why was Bucky trying to downplay this? It was bad, anyone that could see would know that. "Should we go to the hospital?" They wouldn't be able to do anything to fix it of course, but maybe they could prescribe him some painkillers so that he didn't want to die when he swallowed food.

"No. I know you're just lookin' out for me doll, but it would be a waste of time." Bucky was talking slowly so that the words didn't scrape against his throat as much. "You'll see, tomorrow I'll be perfectly fine."

"I'm pretty sure bruises don't heal in a day."

"They do when they're not bad," Bucky said pointedly.

Tony mentally threw his hands up. He would have down it physically but he was still holding the ice pack to Bucky's neck because he didn't trust that his husband would keep it there if he let go. "I married the most ridiculous man on the planet."

"I've heard the stories you tell about the Avengers."

"Yeah but they're _supers_. Pretty much all of them have a healing factor and _you don't_ , so will you at least try to take care of yourself?"

"I always take care of myself Tony. I've got gear and everything."

"Well it's not enough. If you'd let me--"

"No."

"Bucky come on."

"Everyone else gets on just fine with what they've got, and I will too."

Tony grumbled because they'd had this argument before-- every time Bucky got hurt, as a matter of fact, and Tony had yet to win, hence why Bucky _kept getting hurt_. He couldn't help but try one more time though. "If you would just tell me which station you're with, I could talk to your Captain and--"

"No." His voice was still raspy from the injury, but he was firm, not leaving any room for Tony to try to continue and fight it.

So Tony sighed and accepted it until the next time Bucky came home with what was, in Tony's opinion, an unnecessary and avoidable injury. Once upon a time he had been hurt that Bucky wouldn't tell him which station he worked out, but it hadn't taken very long for him to discover that it was to prevent, well, everything Tony wanted to try and do for him where his job was concerned. "I just worry about you, out there on your own," Tony said quietly, like if he talked too loud someone would overhear his admission even though they were in the privacy of their floor in Stark Tower.

"You don't need to, I can take care of myself."

"My definition of what that means is different than yours."

"I'll try to be more careful in the future," he said, but that was what he always said, so Tony just sighed.

* * *

"He keeps doing this and I just-" Tony broke off. "I don't know what to do."

"Uh Tony? You do know I'm not your therapist right?" On the screen, Bruce looked a little confused.

"Gee thanks I hadn't noticed," he said drily. "You're my friend though, and I tend to ask my friends for advice. So what's your advice?"

"Talk to him?"

"Talking hasn't worked."

"Maybe you need... different words?"

"You're not very good at this."

"Did I ever claim to be?" he asked, looking more confused than ever.

"Well no, but come on. 'Different words' is all you have for me?"

"You're talking to someone that had one serious relationship that ended with me fleeing the country. I honestly don't know what you expected."

"I just-." Tony stopped and ran his hand up and down his leg, trying to get rid of the buzzing sensation on his palm. "I feel like he's hiding something," he said eventually. "When we got married, he- I mean he looked like he was in love but maybe--"

"Tony stop. I don't know where you're going with that, and I don't know whether or not Bucky's hiding something from you, but he definitely loves you."

Tony rubbed at his face. "Sometimes that's not enough."

There was a pause, then, "Do you want me to come by for a visit? I was planning on it in a month and a half, but I can come by now if you want." Like Tony, Bruce had retired from the Avengers a couple years ago. He was back to his pre-Avenging days routine, going to countries that needed medical help, and now he even had proper financial backing from Stark Industries to help him out. He still slept on the ground more often than not, but that was because he liked it-- Tony didn't understand in the slightest, but to each his own.

"No it's fine, you know me. Always complaining about something."

Unsurprisingly, Bruce saw right through that lie. "I'm serious Tony. It won't be a problem."

Tony thought about it for a while. He seriously considered it, but in the end the answer was the same. "No, it's fine. It'd be nice to see you, but it's not like you'd be able to fix our relationship just because you're in the same city." He blew out a breath. "I am exaggerating a bit. It's not like our marriage is falling apart at the seams or anything, but he is hiding something." His heart stuttered as he thought of something. "You don't think he's caught up in something criminal do you?"

"Bucky? He doesn't really seem the type," Bruce said honestly. "I know you swoon when you think about him being a normal person's hero--" Tony's words from when he'd been describing Bucky's firefighting physique "--but he doesn't seem like the type to get involved in _anything_ like that."

"Yeah," Tony agreed, chewing on his lip, "I guess."

Down the hallway, far enough away that Jarvis thought he wouldn't be able to hear a word that was being said, Bucky was leaning against the wall. _Oh Tony_ , he thought, _if only you knew_. He'd been trying to get out of this gig for the past year and a half, and all that happened was the Avengers thinking he was turning into a villain. He should have cut all ties when he had a chance, but now he was in too deep. He had an escape plan it just... would take a while. And with every botched operation that put the Winter Soldier in a bad light, the longer that plan would take to implement.

Before now, Bucky had pushed the thoughts aside with the assurances that it wasn't hurting his relationship at all. Apparently, he'd been wrong about that. Which left him feeling- oh what's the phrase? Right: fucked up.

He needed to do something about this, without any of the Five Year Plan bullshit.

* * *

Riri stared at him from inside the armor. "You want out," she said flatly. The Winter Soldier had been causing a major fucking ruckus, and now he calls her up and says that? Yeah, she wasn't born yesterday, and she could smell bullshit a mile away.

"Yes."

"Why?" He hesitated, and she added, "If you're not serious about this, I'm going to leave right now."

"Wait," he blurted, half raising a hand like she had started to leave. "I'm... I'm married. I want out before something happens to them."

She continued to look at him, assessing. She'd talked to the Winter Soldier before-- usually jabs thrown from a couple hundred feet away over hijacked comm systems-- and he was never this open with people. Either he was trying to play her, or he was panicking and genuine. Hopefully it was the second one. "And why exactly do you need my help with that? You want out, just stop."

"It's not that simple."

"It never is when you don't actually want to quit."

He glared at her. She couldn't see it because of his goggles, but in this business, people glaring at you was a sixth sense everyone developed. "I have contracts. Promises I've made to people that don't take it kindly if you drop off the map."

"I'm still not seeing what you expect me to do."

"They're villains."

Ah. "You're selling them out?"

An ugly phrase, but unfortunately it was one that applied. "Yes."

She looked at him a minute longer, and he gave no outward signs that he was nervous. "This sort of thing takes trust. You want me to help you? Fine, but I need to know that you aren't going to stab me in the back when the opportunity presents itself."

Winter snorted. "Trust and me don't go in the same sentence. Can't you just trust in my own self interest?"

"Killing or capturing an Avenger is a big enough prize to make people do stupid things."

"For fuck's sake," he muttered. "I'm tired of killing people. Ask Deadpool, it gets old."

"Deadpool's not exactly on our friend list."

"Yeah but he's not on your hit list either. Look, are you willing to help me or not? I can do this without you, and I don't like wasting my time."

"We both know I'm going to help you, but you could have made it a little easier on me," she grumbled, mostly just to see how he would react.

"Yeah I'm real torn up about it," he said flatly. "Ready?"

"What, right now?"

"I'm on a deadline." A self imposed one, mostly, but it was there all the same. Plus he didn't want to see how much further his relationship with Tony would degrade if he put this off.

"Well tough toenails, bub, I'm in charge and we're working at my pace."

* * *

Getting rid of villains? Not near as easy as Steve had made it look back in the day. Bucky was more bruises than man these days, and Tony had definitely noticed how tired he always was. His current excuse was that the flu was going around the firestation, and Bucky was picking up people's shifts so that when he inevitably got sick it wouldn't be quite so bad. It was a massive lie, both for the firestation flu and the statement that Bucky would get sick. He comforted himself by saying that this would all be over soon and he'd be able to come clean.

Unfortunately, he never got that far. On his last mission with Riri-- whose name he officially did not know-- he got shot. She didn't know that the bullet made it past his body armor, otherwise she would have offered medical assistance. She pretended all day long that she didn't like him in the slightest, but he'd seen her interact with people she hated and it wasn't the same. He wouldn't have accepted the help even if he needed it, but that wasn't the point. The point was that he didn't have his torso bandaged and he was bleeding everywhere. Tony was supposed to be in meetings all day, and that's the only reason Bucky risked going home; he thought it was completely safe.

He was out of the Winter Soldier mask and goggles, but that was as far as he got into his civilian identity. He didn't use the holographic sleeve to make his arm appear differently, he didn't take off his pants or the various weapons attached to it, and since he was in the middle of taking care of his wound, there was no disguising the blood all over his stomach.

And that's how Tony found him. With his shirt off but very clearly the Winter Soldier, and holding gauze to the hole in his side. "Bucky? What- _oh my god_ is that blood?" His eyes darted from Bucky's face down to his stomach, and from there to the incriminating evidence that his husband wasn't the everyday hero he thought he was. He took half a step back automatically, bumping his shoulder into the door frame. "You're the Winter Soldier," he said, and there was no mistaking his tone-- it wasn't exactly hero worship.

"Um." His mind raced through possibilities, discarding and rifling through them all in an instant. He was caught, and there was nothing he could do about it. "Yeah." He took a deep breath and reached a hand up as he said, "Listen, I didn't want to-" he cut off sharply when Tony flinched from him. Hard. Hard enough that cracked his elbow against the door frame but he didn't even notice because he was staring at Bucky with terror-filled eyes. Bucky felt his heart break, and he slowly brought his hand back down to his side. "I'm not going to hurt you," he said quietly, hating with every syllable that it was something he had to say. He absolutely despised that he'd done this to Tony, that he'd given him reason to think he was capable of it.

Tony didn't say anything. He didn't look very comforted either, but at least he wasn't leaving or calling the Avengers. Well... there was no guarantee that Jarvis wasn't doing that, but what could Bucky do? A fat lot of nothing.

"Has Riri talked to you about the Winter Soldier recently?"

He shook his head, a quick rabbit motion.

"I'm getting out. She's helping me tie up loose ends, and then I'm quitting. I know it started to get in the way of our relationship and that I should have told you sooner, but I thought it was safer for everyone if I kept it secret. I swear to you Tony, it wasn't supposed to be like this; I was just trying to take down Hydra and I got in over my head but I didn't want to admit it. I-" Bucky stopped blinking tears out of his eyes before they could fully form. "No matter what else you might think about me now, I want you to know that I love you and I will _never_ hurt you."

"...You're still bleeding."

"What?"

Tony nodded at his injury. "You're still bleeding. Do you not know how to take care of yourself or did I interrupt you?" His voice was small and unusually lackluster, but since he wasn't trembling in fear anymore, Bucky would take it.

"Oh um," Bucky glanced down, "little bit of both." Usually he cleaned the wound and took it easy until it healed enough that he could work again. It was a tactic he'd learned from Hydra, and needless to say, they hadn't taught him the best self-care techniques.

"Sit down," he said, walking into the bathroom and motioning for Bucky to sit on the counter.

Unsure about what was happening in his husband's head, Bucky did as he asked.

Tony cleaned the rest of the blood off, telling Bucky when something would hurt-- though it was scarcely more than a slight sting. "I guess I can't convince you to go to a hospital?"

He shook his head. "Not safe. Besides, it'll heal in a couple days."

"How could it-" Tony stopped. "Right, accelerated healing." He blew out a breath as he bandaged him up. "Guess that came in handy hiding things from me."

"It did a bit."

Tony glared at him. "You weren't supposed to agree with me, you were supposed to feel guilty."

"I'm great at multitasking."

"Hmph." Tony turned back to the injury at hand. He was silent as he finished, and it was only when he was washing his hands that he spoke again. "Did you mean it?"

"The part about loving you or the part where I'm quitting? The answer's going to be yes either way."

"Both, I suppose." He still had the quiet pitch to his voice, and Bucky hated it. He'd ruined something here, and he didn't know if it was salvageable.

"Do you still love me?" he found himself asking.

"Yes," Tony said. The answer was swift, but he didn't seem happy about it. "God Bucky, why didn't you tell me?" He looked Bucky dead in the eye, letting him see all the hurt that he was feeling. "What did I do to make you think you couldn't trust me with this?"

"I trust you." Tony scoffed, so Bucky said, "I _do_. I trust you Tony, but you got out of the super business years ago, and I wasn't willing to give it up. At first I didn't tell you because I didn't want to drag you back in, and then it just- you seemed so happy when Riri took over and I didn't want to ruin that for you."

"Lying to me was clearly the better option," Tony said sarcastically.

"I'm _sorry_. Hindsight's twenty-twenty you know."

"You don't get to joke about this."

Bucky winced. "Right. Sorry."

There was a long silence where neither of them so much as shifted their weight. "You love me."

"Yes."

"And you were going to leave... all that behind." There was a slight pause between his words where he couldn't settle on what he should call the Winter Soldier's run in the modern super world.

"Yes, I'm leaving it. Riri's helping me out. She's a good kid."

"And she doesn't know that it's you?"

"No," Bucky said, shaking his head, "she has no idea."

Tony blew out a breath. "You just made my life so much more complicated."

"Are you turning me in?" Bucky asked, alarmed. He knew that Tony would do anything for his wonderful firefighter husband, but since Bucky wasn't entirely that person, he didn't know if that would transfer over.

" _No_ , jesus christ Bucky. I meant- fuck, I don't even know. I was wondering what I was supposed to do with this information, but I guess if you're quitting there's nothing _to_ do. Wait," he said with a frown as something occurred to him, "what do you do when you would leave for work? Your normally scheduled work, I mean."

"Sometimes it was actually firefighting," he offered feebly. He hadn't been able to really hold onto it as a fulltime job because then there would be times that he was required to be there that he couldn't commit to, but he had established a presence. It had mostly been so that if/when Tony looked him up, he'd find a record, and a little lie was easier to explain than a complete and total lie. "Most of the time I would meet up with Wade though. He always had something to do."

"Wade?" Tony repeated, not recognizing who that meant. "Wade _Wilson_ ? You were hanging out with _Deadpool_?"

Bucky didn't think it would help his case to point out that it was less hanging out and more going on mini-missions together, so he said, "Yes."

Tony groaned, rubbing a now clean hand over his face. "He knows who you are. That makes a lot of what he's said to me make way more sense." Not all of it of course, because it was Wade, but a considerable amount. Like that time he'd asked Tony for a threesome and said that he knew Tony was into the not-quite-a-hero type.

"He doesn't know," Bucky corrected. He'd never taken off the mask, given his name, or given any indication that he had a personal life outside of his Winter Soldier duties.

"You may not have told him, but he knows." Tony went into their room and grabbed a baggy shirt for Bucky to put on, holding it out to him when he got back to the bathroom.

"Are we... still together?" Bucky asked hesitantly.

"Yeah. At least I think so." Tony made a face, his nose scrunching up in a way that made Bucky want to coo over how cute he was. "I guess the bottom line is that I love you, and I- well I don't _want_ us to break up. We'll figure everything else out later. For now let's just get some food and make sure you heal up."

Bucky nodded, getting to his feet. He moved slowly, so that Tony could stop him if he wanted to; he didn't. Bucky leaned down, pressing a sweet kiss to Tony's forehead. "I love you."

Tony let out a shuddering breath, holding onto Bucky's wrist with whitened fingers. "I love you too."


End file.
